Travel Journals - May 20, 2005

Today was sort of a half day. We had to start packing in the afternoon, so the morning tour had to be short. Our rep took us to the large park in the area. The word "large" could not fully describe this park. It had everything! Coy ponds, shrub sculptures and amusement park rides. It was beautiful. Absolutely breath-taking. There were even some older folks gathered to play music in the gazebo. There were many bicyclists and motorcyclists buzzing around the park as well. Our group seemed to be the celebrities in the park as everyone wanted to stop and stare (at US and the babies)! We did the room service thing again for lunch. I know, no guts. Mary was getting ready to take her nap so we didn't want to risk going to a restaurant and having her crabby! We ordered some fried rice for her and I to share. She was a pig!

I am glad to see that more and more of her personality comes out each day. The orphanage report said that she was calm and quiet. I think they were looking at the wrong baby when they wrote that. Mary is anything BUT calm and quiet! She is full of energy, loves to be the center of attention and is inquisitive about everything! She can't help touching everything. I am surprised though that very little goes in her mouth. She won't even put snack items in her mouth. The orphanage workers warned us of that. I imagine that will change as her environment changes. I am curious to see how she is around her new big brothers.

The rest of the afternoon was spent trying to figure out how to get all of this STUFF into the suitcases! (the suitcases by the way are getting HAMMERED on this trip. I hope mom and dad did not pay too much for them for me at Christmas, because I am not sure they are destined for more travels) We got rid of a bunch of items that Mary either didn't fit, didn't like or would not use. The lists of travel needs I have been studying over the past many months were a little exaggerated. There are so many things I brought that will NOT be coming home with us (and not going to Guangzhou)! Rob got rid of a few "thrift store" pants he would not be wearing (too hot) and we threw a bunch of things away. There were a few items that we purchased in Changsha that needed to fit too. We bought Mary her jade necklace (going in the carry on thank you), an embroidered fan and stuffed animal, a collector stamp book (weighs a ton) and several other little things. They were gonna add weight, that was for sure.

We met up in the elevator lobby to receive all of Mary's paperwork from the
Registration and Notary office. We got her passport! We got her adoption paperwork! We are ready to go! Daphne also made this a special occasion by presenting us with more gifts. She gave us a map of Hunan and circled Zhijiang for us, and she gave us a priceless memento for Mary, a bit of soil from her home town. She had pre-arranged with Mary's orphanage to bring with them (when they delivered the babies) a small bit of soil for each girl. It is an old Chinese tradition to give a family member a small bit of soil if they are to be traveling far from home. This will help to remind them of home if they get homesick. Daphne put the soil in little silk pouches for the girls and made most (if not all) the parents cry. Such an amazing gift can never be properly repaid.

Tomorrow we leave for Guangzhou! Here are some pictures from today.

Mary & Mama on the bus


Martyrs Park sculptures


The monument at Martyrs Park


The happy new Mama and Baba posing with their new daughter


Ready for Guangzhou!

Travel Journals - May 19, 2005

Today started out with the normal breakfast buffet at the hotel. Mary ate quite well this morning considering the only thing she has wanted lately is her bottle. They had her spicy fried rice this morning and rice congee (like cream of wheat). She ate her fill! The food so far has been excellent, everywhere we have eaten. So much flavor that its gonna be hard to go back to the way we normally eat in the states. I am thinking some Chinese cooking lessons are in order. (Getting good with chopsticks too!)

There were two tours planned today. I opted to send Rob to the morning one so I could stay behind with Mary. She has been missing her morning naps and has been getting very crabby because of it. (Her schedule is REALLY messed up) Plus it gave me a chance to work on the travel journals. The outing this morning was to visit a local kindergarten. Rob took over a hundred pictures and video taped the whole thing so I could see it. The children sang for the Americans and then, the Americans had to sing for them! Rob said they taught them Old MacDonald and Itsy Bitsy Spider. I am glad that I stayed back though. Mary only took a 45 minute nap and was REALLY CRABBY! We tried to "walk off" her bad mood in the stroller...wasn't happening. So I let her cry herself back to sleep. THEN we got a good nap out of her. She woke up in a slightly better mood. She has attached herself to me and wants me to hold her all the time. If I am holding her and she has my undivided attention, she is happy and laughing and being silly. If not, its 50% / 50% what kind of mood she will be in. We think she becomes momentarily possessed. :-) Rob is feeling left out and my arms are soooo sore from carrying her!

We had room service for lunch. We were feeling lazy, plus we didn't have much time
before the afternoon tour. Rob ordered a "Hamburger without the fried egg on top" (every sandwich of that type has a fried egg on top...we cannot figure out why). We were able to get some fried rice for Mary and I was dying for some fresh fruit. Rob had to tell the poor Chinese guy on the phone "FRUIT" probably a dozen times. He eventually had to spell it. When lunch arrived, the waiter took the lids off the food, we signed the ticket and he went on his merry way. I turned to look at the food and about fell over laughing. Rob got EXACTLY what he ordered. A HAM-burger! A nice (he said tasty too) burger with all the fixings and a piece of HAM on the top! They took him LITERALLY! Oh it was so funny. It took Rob a minute to figure out what I was laughing at. I told him he needs to be very careful how he words things from now on.

The afternoon tour was to the Embroidery Institute/Factory. Rob tried to dog out of it, but I made him go (and bring the charge card)! It was rather neat. Hunan is known for their embroidery and now we see why. It was amazing. The embroideries that were displayed in their museum were breathtaking. It was hard to believe all of these items were HAND stitched. Then they led us into one of the working rooms to watch the women stitch. I have no idea how they are able to do that. It was astonishing the things they could do with silk thread! One woman showed her work-in-progress to the group. It was a tiger head about 12 inches in diameter. It was double sided, so the same image appeared on both sides of the fabric. The needle was so small, you could hardly see it! She had been working on this embroidery for SIX MONTHS and still was not done. Whew. What patience. Then they led us to the showroom of course. Absolutely beautiful stuff. Some with beautiful price tags too. We didn't buy anything large. We bought Mary a stuffed tiger with an embroidered face and an embroidered fan with a bird on it. Just a little something from her home province. Trust me, we could have spent a fortune in there. And to think, I was still feeling guilty about spending $250 at the jade factory!

Then it was a quiet evening. Daphne had us pre-order dinner, which she delivered to our room for us. It was some WELL needed western food. Pizza Hut!!!! Don't get me wrong, the food here has been amazing, but that pizza tasted awesome! We were only brave enough to order the Cheese Lovers as the other "options" on the menu all included some weird stuff (like tuna and chicken WITH pineapple...pass on those ones!!).

Here are some pictures from today.

Mary playing on the bed (she is an early riser!)


The kids and our travel group at the school


An embroidery that took FOUR years to complete


Mary didn't like the stroller too much!

Travel Journals - May 18, 2005

Mary woke up feeling much better this morning. She was back to her old self at
the breakfast table, laughing and throwing food at Daddy and playing the
"throw toy on floor and watch them pick it up" game. I forgot what it was like
having a baby!!

We left for a shopping trip at 9:30am. We were going to a place called the Apollo. It was a HUGE, fancy mall. Daphne automatically took us to the floor with all of the baby stuff. (Imagine that) I must say, what an experience! First off, there was NO AIR CONDITIONING! A big fancy mall and there was no AC. Eek. It was sweltering in there. No air movement whatsoever. Now, shopping in China is WAY different than it is in the states. There are different "sections" of the store, each separating a certain manufacturer. You pick out what you like (the staff was very helpful, but spoke NO English...we used a "cheat sheet" that Daphne gave us), then they give you a ticket (not the merchandise). You then go up to the central pay desk and pay for whatever you wanted. Then you go back to that section, show them the receipt, THEN they give you the merchandise. So if you pass by something you want, you have to go through the steps all over again. Not fun if you are buying from SEVERAL different departments and manufacturers. Absolutely crazy.

Oh...and we got yelled at! An older lady came up to me and was talking very loud in Chinese at me. Then she would tug on Mary pants and pat her bare skin. Then she did the same for her arms which were showing skin too! I felt like saying "Lady...its 100 degrees in here!!" but couldn't. I just smiled and pulled her pant legs and her sleeves down. We got KFC to go before leaving the store. We did get Mary a few outfits because all of the one piece outfits don't fit her. She's too long!

We went back to the hotel and laid Mary down for a nap. Dad went over to the post office to see if he could get come collector stamps for Mary and Mom was really hoping for a short nap. Ha! Mary had plans otherwise. She didn't sleep for very long. So we decided to go down to the pool. Mary wasn't too sure of the pool. It was a big cold bath tub and it took a while to get use to the water. She splashed a little.

In the afternoon, we took the hotel bus over to the river. We walked around the
gardens on the riverbank. It was raining a little so the hotel sent us all with
umbrellas. There were many people out (in the rain, mind you) flying kites. The kites were amazing! There were HUGE lizard and dragon kits and rainbow colored kites. It was so neat to see. Daphne says on a good day, there are hundreds of people out there flying kites.

For dinner, we went out as a group to another Dim Sum restaurant across the street. Our rep pre-ordered several dishes for us which made things easier. I have no idea what some of the dishes were, but we tried them. The radish balls were the best! There were huge tanks with LIVE fish and such in them that you could "pick out" for your dinner. They had HUGE fish, rays, shrimp and many other things. They also played live music although I have never seen some of the instruments they were playing. It was very nice. I was really hoping to update the website last night, but again, Mary had plans otherwise.

Here are some pics from today.

The popular mode of transportation in Changsha


Playing with Mama at the play area the hotel set up for the families


At the Xiang River

Travel Journals - May 17, 2005

May 17th-Adoption Day!
This morning we started off by going to the buffet breakfast at the hotel. They
actually serve a really good breakfast. Mary was pretty good at the table, a little
loud though. She likes to be the center of attention. She had some rice, which we are finding to be her favorite. After breakfast, we prepared our first diaper bag. The hotel would not let us take the sink, but I think we pretty much took everything else. Today is the day that we make Mary officially ours. We had to go back over to the Civil Affairs office and finalize the adoption. Lucky for us, they had power today. No air conditioning though. When we first got there, we were the only group. Then more and more and MORE groups started showing up and having to wait in the same HOT waiting room. Nice. Hot mommies and daddies and hot and cranky babies. It made for a pleasant sound.

We began with the interview with the Registration Officer. The first question she
asked was the important one. "Are you happy with this baby?" Duh. Like we really had to think about that one. Even if there were some doubts in our minds, I could not imagine saying "No". We had to put our thumb print in red ink over top of our signature to make things official and Mary had to put her footprint on the certificate. Then we had to go back to the hot, screaming baby waiting room. Fun. Them we went to get our "family" picture taken for the adoption certificate. Quick and painless.

Then we had to go back to....you guessed it...the hot, screaming baby waiting room. It was all standing room only now. At least they opened up the windows so we all could get some air. Everyone was amused watching the school kids across the alley wave and yell "Whats you name??" at all the people in the window of the waiting room. They came to get one parent from each family to go see the Notary. This was the time we got to take all that money (orphanage fee, etc). It was actually a relief to not have to carry that around anymore.

Then we were done! Mary was ours! Forever! What a neat feeling. We headed back to the hotel to feed Mary and put her down for a nap. She was cranky, but then again, so were we. She only slept for about an hour and woke up crying. This was really the first time she really belted out a cry. There was a reason. When we picked her up, she was hot. I mean really hot. We took her temperature...almost 103 degrees! Freak out time! We gave her some motrin and tried to cool her off with a bath. No dice. That made her scream worse.

We called our rep, Daphne to tell her Mary was sick and running a fever. It took
her less than a minute to get to our room. The doctor was due in shortly, so our room would be her first stop. Mary's throat had gotten worse so it was time to break out the antibiotics. The doctor also gave us some medicine to fight against a virus too. Between the two meds, it should knock things out.

We met for a group dinner at 5:30 pm after an afternoon of rocking Mary back and forth and walking the length of the hotel room. We weren't sure if dinner was going to last very long with her feeling bad, but were willing to try. I'm glad we did. Dinner was great! Best meal yet. We DID have to take turns rocking her and walking around the restaurant, but dinner tasted so good that we didn't want to leave. Then our rep breaks out the cake. She had a birthday cake for all the girls that had just turned or were about to turn one (Mary included). She also had a second cake to celebrate Forever Day (adoption day). This was the day all the girls had Forever Families and it was something worth celebrating. They had the neatest candles on the cake I had ever seen. Daphne called them magic candles. When you like them, they shoot up flames like a firework, then the big flame goes down, and the whole candle opens up into a flower with candles on the petals. It was COOL! The cake tasted awesome. Some type of sponge cake with whip cream and fruit. Then Daphne gave all the girls birthday presents. She gave them a Chinese Wall Hanging (for good luck) and a copy of the Hunan Times for that day (in Chinese of course). It was very special to us and to all the families.

When we got back to the hotel, I tried to get online and update the website, but
Miss Mary had plans otherwise. She really likes to be rocked to sleep and really
loves her Mama. Rob is trying to not let it bother him that Mary merely "tolerates" him. He's doing pretty well. He has not had the guts to try a diaper yet, but he is getting good at making her bottles and packing the diaper bag.

Here are a couple pictures from today.

Waiting at the civil affairs office


The interview with the Notary


The cakes for the birthday/gotcha day party


Poor little sick Mary

Travel Journals - May 16, 2005

May 16th-GOTCHA DAY!!!
Today started early. Around 3am. I couldn't sleep. After getting in at midnight, we were both hopeful to be able to sleep from pure exhaustion. No dice. We received our 6am wake up call, but we were already wide awake and playing on the Internet. We went down to breakfast at 6:30am.

The breakfast buffet at the hotel is pretty good, but there are definitely some
things on the buffet that you don't see everyday in the states. Fried noodles (my favorite dish so far), dim sum, steamed eggs (apparently a favorite for the babies...looks nasty!), steamed veggies, fried rice and other unusual things...for BREAKFAST Wow. They had eggs and hash browns and bacon and sausage too though, so Rob was okay to eat (although he is NOT complaining about the food so far, he says its pretty good)!

We met at 7:30 to fill out paperwork for the adoption. Daphne had to walk us
through it because every single parent in that room had Baby-Brain. Plus, the documents were not in English (minor detail). Then it was time to leave to go get our baby!

We again piled on a bus and headed for the Civil Affairs office. We were warned ahead of time that the power was out to the building so it was going to be HOT and stuffy and they were going to make this trip short and sweet. I refer to it as the "Grab and Dash". It truly was. As we were walking into the building, a group of babies were walking in (with their nannies of course). Everyone FREAKED trying to decide if these were "our" babies. Our rep finally had to tell us these were NOT ours and to hurry inside. Whew. What a roller coaster. We rushed upstairs of this hot & stuffy building along side of nannies and babies (not ours) which was very
overwhelming.

They immediately rushed us into a conference room and started calling names to "line up" in the order we would all receive our children. We were about seventh. All the sudden the flurry started. The nannies started showing up with the babies, one coming into the room at a time. Things all went so fast. Before we knew it, we were next! Once we realized we were next up, we looked up and saw her. There was our baby girl. Our names were called and we went through the formalities (showing identification, then comparing identification of the baby they were about to hand us). Then it happened. The nanny stepped up and handed us the most beautiful angel
we had ever seen.

Time stopped there for a minute. All of the noise and commotion disappeared. This was the moment we had waited for. Mary was in our arms. Words can never describe the feelings we had at that very moment. It was so surreal. Then time started again. We were rushed to the other side of the room so the next family could be "created". We stood there with Mary. She was little. Smaller than we expected. She was beautiful. She was fascinated with us. More specifically with Rob's glasses and my tongue (she would stick out her tongue, so I would stick out mine...so she could touch it). Then we got back on the bus and went back to the hotel. Mary fell asleep on the bus and we did not have the heart to wake her up. There were several babies screaming, but it didn't seem to bother Miss Mary.

We let her sleep back in the room for about an hour and a half. Then, as she opened her eyes to see a strange room with strange people, PANIC ATTACK! Luckily it only lasted for about ten minutes. We gave her a bottle and she was fine. We set her on the floor to play with her toys and she was fine. We even got some smiles out of her! And it was just like that, we were a family. We spent the rest of the day in the room, getting to know each other. Rob did go with a group to the local store for some formula and junk food (for me, not the baby).

The pediatrician came by later with Daphne to check on all the babies. Mary
had a little bit of sniffles, but nothing major. The doctor did notice Mary's
throat was red, as were all the babies from Zhijiang. We were to watch her and the doc would be back the next day to check on her. Then the orphanage director and some of the nannies came by the room. They brought us her camera back and the photo book! Then we signed some papers that relinquished custody from the director and gave it to us. The director played with Mary. She recognized him right away. I don't think Mary's nanny was there because she did not respond too much to any of
them. Just the director.

We managed to get her to go to bed about 8:30pm. I first laid her down and she started to cry. Then I remember reading in an update we received last night that she likes to be rocked to sleep. Okay! I can do that! Under two minutes, she was OUT!

Below are a couple of pictures from today's surreal events.

Waiting to leave for the civil affairs office


Waiting for the moment of truth!


Gotcha!


Mary sleeping back at the hotel


Playing with her new Mama


Precious Mary

Travel Journals - May 15, 2005

May 15th-Last day in Hong Kong
Not much to do today. We had to check out of our hotel room by noon, so
they set us up a "day use" room until it was time to go to the airport. We
didn't have to leave until 4pm, so that was going to be a long day. The day
use room ended up being OUR room, so that worked out rather well.

I finally talked Rob into taking me over to the pearl market which was about
two blocks from the hotel. This "market" was just a jewelry store, so no
excitement there. Holy s***! Those prices were OUTRAGEOUS! Granted, everything was beautiful, but very very pricey. I spotted (okay and tried on) this beautiful black pearl earring and necklace set. It was almost $1500! Owie. Not for me. I would be afraid to wear them!!!

It was very hot and humid so we didn't want to wander too far from the wonderful air conditioning at the hotel. We got to talk to the boys via instant message this morning so I felt a little better.

It came time to leave for the airport. I must say, our rep was just plain awesome. He handled every detail. We loaded our luggage and ourselves on to the bus and off to the airport we went. He helped us get checked in and told us which gate to find. (He even got us around that 44lb weight limit thing! COOL) Originally our flight was supposed to take off at 6:35 pm, but it had been moved to 7:15pm. So we waited at the gate. It was so funny to watch all of these "expectant" parents wait for a LATE plane. We were all antsy. Luckily, we found a Starbucks at the airport. That HELPED! Until they pushed the departure off again. To 7:30. Then again...to 8:00. We all were about to explode. Finally the time came to leave . I must say I have never before gotten on a plane via a bus ride to the tarmac. We climbed these funky steps and FINALLY we were on our way to Changsha! Let me tell you, this was not a pleasant flight. It was only an hour and ten minutes, but it felt like an eternity. Small plane. Small seats. And a smelly French man sitting next to us. Then they served us to poorest excuse for airport food ever! Oh well. We got off with only but a little nausea.

Customs and immigration was a little intimidating, but it was no problem. Everyone just smiled. Our rep (Daphne) in Changsha met us outside of customs with her sister. The airport in Changsha was much smaller, but not bad. There was a nice scuffle that broke out just before we left between some men and an older woman getting off the plane and some men at the gate. We thought for sure fists were going to fly. Very loud, heated argument. Whats worse is that I think they were all FAMILY!! Just another plain old family feud.

On the bus, Daphne gave us all a wet towel to clean up with (what a thoughtful thing), bottled water and OREOS! Definately what these cranky Americans needed! We got checked into our hotel about 10:30pm and got to bed about midnight. what a day. And tomorrow is the big day! Like we were going to sleep anyways!

Below are a couple pictures from today's endevours.

Travel Journals - May 14, 2005

May 14th-Hong Kong
We managed to get a little sleep last night. Still feels like not enough. The
jetlag thing is catching us pretty good. Today we were taken on an amazing
tour of Hong Kong. Our guide took us across the harbour to Hong Kong island and all the way up to the top of the moutain. The peak is called Victoria Peak. It was a very winding bus ride through very scary traffic. I could not believe those drivers don't hit each other more often. That bus got so close to other vehicles (especially other buses) that he litterally had to inch past it to make sure no one "scraped" each other. And those roads are so narrow! I know we are fat, lazy Americans, but apparently we have FAT streets in the US too!

When we got to the peak, the view was astonishing. A little hazy because of
the overcast, we were still able to see the entire city and the harbour. We
were surprised, here are MANY large cargo ships that frequent the harbour
as well as a large floating Casino.

Then we headed back down the mountain to Stanley Market for some shopping. Let me tell you, I don't normally like shopping but O-M-G! What a neat place. We only spent about twenty bucks, but we got a set of wooden dolls, post cards, 3 t-shirts, a scarf and we found Mary a rattle-drum! I was LOVING it! We were supposed to bargain with the shopkeepers, but we didn't. Everything was so cheap that we felt guilty. Isn't that bad? We promise to practice our bargaining skills in Changsha.
Then our guide took us to the Aberdeen fishing village. That was an experience. We paid $100 Hong Kong dollars (about $13 US) for this smelly boat ride through the fishing harbour. I took over forty pictures! What an interesting way of life. Our guide said there are still about 14,000 fisherman in Hong Kong. Those fisherman live on these itty bitty fishing boats all the time. Made us feel real good about how we have it.

Next, we were taken to the Aberdeen Jade Factory. We knew before we went
in there to think dollar signs, and WHOA! It was neat to see how they make a
lot of the jewelry (not just jade). Then they led us into the showroom (how
convenient). Okay...we will admit it. We DID buy Mary her traditional piece
of jade (maybe for her 16th birthday). It is a georgeous pendant with an oval
piece of green jade, acented with three diamonds. Don't ask how much we paid. I was surpised Rob didn't cringe more, but jade WAS on our list of things to buy for Mary while in China. She is gonna have to be a lot older before she gets it!

Our last stop on the tour was at the Jade Garden restaraunt for a traditional
Dim Sum lunch. It was the greatest meal I think we ever had. They kept bringing more and more food out and setting it on the lazy susan in the middle of the table. It was delicious!

I am only going to post a few pictures from today as the picture files are
HUGE and are eating up the memory on my site. I would rather give
everyone our travel log more than pictures, but here are a few.

A fisher-dog (notice the man SHOWERING behind him? Oops!)


More of the fishing village


The market


The view from Victoria Peak


Us at the peak!

Travel Journals - May 11 - May 13, 2005

May 11th-Denver
I can't believe we are finally on our way to China. This is really happening! So
long in the planning, even longer in the dreaming. Rob's anxiety level is high enough at the moment to cover our entire travel group. He was singled out at
the security check station and rec'd a "hand-check" from Mr Friendly Security
Guard whildest FREAKING out because his backpack was more than 5' from him. A little harmless nausea when we got to the concourse, and he is back to normal..sorta (see pic below with his JUNK FOOD). OMG! We have not even left Denver yet. I am in BIG trouble.



May 11th-San Francisco
We FINALLY made it to California. I say finally because our plane was late
coming into DIA, late getting back out of DIA and ran into a whole run of
problems once we landed in CA. We had to WAIT for someone to "park" the
plane. We had to WAIT & WAIT & WAIT for someone to come open the dog-gone door! Sigh. At least we made it. Rob got hung up AGAIN at the security station and had to be hand-checked. The man honestly didn't even think to take off his BELT! Brilliant. Now there are several hours of pacing and harmless nausea before our flight to Hong Kong leaves (at 1:20 am).

May 13th-HONG KONG AT LAST!
Yes, you will notice that May 12th for us just disappeared. Between the time change and the evil flight, its gone. The flight was brutal. I will kid you not. The seats are uncomfortable and close together. But the staff were simply the best. Those flight attendants were the best I have ever seen. They were all so nice and polite and helpful...and BEAUTIFUL (they were all Chinese). The food was quite good, although I was not able to eat much. The old tummy was riding a roller coaster during the flight. I was able to get very little sleep, so I am now a walking Zombie. Rob was able to sleep more, although the man fidgeted every five seconds (not kidding). Made it real hard for me to try and lay my head on his shoulder. Sigh.

I am happy to say we are back on the ground now in a most amzing country. I have never seen any place like it. The flight was hard, but so far it was worth it (and we have not even gotten the baby yet). Our travel group is awesome. Some first time parents, some parents like us (older kids and starting over) and one couple who has been-there-done-that. Its a great combination of personalities.

Our guide in Hong Kong is Mathew and I must say, his "Chinglish" is a little hard to get use to understanding. He's great thought. Tomorrow he is taking us on a tour and out to a fabulous Dim Sum place for lunch. Can't wait.

The hotel is amazing. We sort of feel out of our element. Very ritzy and posh. We feel like rich folks here! Rob has gone around the entire room and touched EVERYTHING at least twice. (Ha...and we don't even have the toddler yet..double sigh). We are having a lazy day today because we are simply exhausted. I had
a nice bubble bath which made me feel SOOO much better. We might venture out to dinner either to the Steak House down the street or to one of the three restarants in the hotel (they are supposed to be GREAT, but with a great price tag too). Oh well. We will only be in China once.

We'll update more tomorrow after the tour. Not too many pictures today, but here's a couple...



On the bus from the airport to the hotel


The view from the hotel lobby


The hotel room


The harbour

May 2005 - Pre Travel

Its hard to believe we are honestly leaving for China. I'm finding it hard to
breathe just thinking about it. We have gone over the packing slips a thousand
times. Everything that is in the suitcases now is ALL that we are taking. Not
that I could find any more room anyway!

This begins the next, exciting chapter in our lives. Not only are we going to see
our baby girl for the first time, but we are going to travel across the world and
see the most amazing sites.
We can hardly wait!

April 13, 2005

Today we received another update, this one with pictures!



She has grown so much! Isn't she beautiful???



She has 4 teeth and can stand up!

April 2005

It hard to believe it has been almost four weeks since we got our referral. I do not know where the time went. It's strange. The wait was so long for our precious referral and yet I cannot recall where the past several weeks have gone. I have spent many hours staring at the picture of our little China angel. I have memorized her face and it is now permanently burned into my memory. I have not been sleeping much. Too many thoughts are hovering in my mind. I cannot believe we have a daughter. I have been filled with such a multitude of feelings. I of course am extremely elated, but I am also sad. We will be taking this precious girl away from the only thing that she has ever known. The only people she has ever know.

Her place of birth. I wish I knew more about where she comes from so that I may one day teach her how to appreciate her roots. China is an amazing country. I hope she will remember some of it.

We received our travel approval from China on Friday (the 8th). What a relief. Forward momentum towards Mary. We are now awaiting our appointment with the US Consulate in Guangzhou, Guangdong. This will be our final destination while in China. This is where we will complete Mary's paperwork in order to bring her back home to the United States.

We received a little more information about Mary on Monday (the 11th). It was not much, but it made me so happy that I cried. It told us where she was abandoned and who found her. It told us what she likes and more about who she is. It told us what she was eating and what kind of schedule she is on. That information was so much more than we were given on referral day. It was so priceless. We of course fell in love with her at first sight, but now we know where her life began and how it has developed. If this is the only update that we get, I will be eternally grateful for what I have. I feel like I know her better now. I just hope I recognize her when I see her (a little fear that I am working through there). :-)

So now we get ready for the biggest trip of our lives. I am nervous. There is still a little packing to do. Not much. I think I will be ready. I want to be ready to take in as much as I possibly can of China. I want to take tons of pictures and have tons of memories that I can share with her when she gets older. I want to feel what China is really like and where my precious daughter began her life. I am disappointed I have not been able to find more information about Mary's city or about her orphanage. It's such a mystery. We won't get to visit her city, and that makes me sad. I wish I had the chance to meet "her people". Perhaps there is another trip to China in our futures, if only to answer some questions.

Here we come, China. We are coming to make your daughter...ours.

Mary's Referral

Introducing Zhi Yue (Soon to be Mary Yue-Anne)



Born on April 20, 2004
In the Hunan province of the Peoples Republic of China
Now residing in the Zhijiang Dong Atonomous County Social Welfare Institute
in Zhijiang, Hunan



She is described as quiet and loves music and her toy rattle drum!



We are SO in love!

March 17, 2005 ~ Referral Day!

This morning, we were both wired out of our brains. I managed to get a few things done at work, all the while JUMPING on the phone every time it rang. My customers were subjected to disappointing sighs when I found out it wasn't "the call".

It honestly FELT like I was in labor waiting to leave for the hospital. My tummy was doing aerobics. I felt like I was going to toss my cookies. That feeling didn't go away. At 10:58 am, I answered the phone. It was Sarah from CCAI. It honestly took me half a second for it to register in my brain. Oh my god. This is it! Sarah asked me how I was. I said, "I don't know, you tell me....." Sarah said "Well, I think St. Patricks Day just became very lucky for you". She asked if I wanted to take a drive to Denver. Ummmmm.....YES!!!!

Then she says, "Okay, drive safe then." My heart stopped for a second. "Wait! Aren't you going to give me ANY information???????" I shrieked! Then she told me she would tell me anything I wanted to know. She gave me the basics to tie me over until we got there. I got her name and what it means, her measurements and where she was.
I then hung up the phone and sat there. I had forgotten to breathe through that and I felt like I was going to pass out. Then I called Rob. "Are you ready to go?" I asked. We met up at the highway and took the hour and twenty-minute trip to the agency. It seemed like an eternity.

When we arrived, we saw a sign in the entryway that read "SURPRISE...ALL THE BABIES
ARE IRISH AND THEY ALL HAVE RED HAIR!" (It was St. Patty's Day after all). We went
to the counter and asked for Sarah. She was on her phone!!! Oh no. More waiting. We
paced back and forth for over ten minutes, all the while, I felt like I was going to throw up. Other couples were going in and coming out with their baby pictures. This was not helping.

Finally Sarah came out, apologizing. I couldn't wait any longer. I said, "You better show me the picture of that baby before I throw up!"I cannot explain the feeling that pulsed through my body when she opened that folder and we saw our daughter for the first time. The moment was surreal. Time stood still. Her picture stole my breath away. The tears welled up. There was my baby. That is the angel that we were waiting for after all these many months. People say that when you see her picture that all of the sudden the horrible wait is worth it. They were right. All of the sudden, nothing else mattered. Our dream became a living, breathing angel waiting for us in Zhijiang. Her name was Yue.
We went through all the information that our agency had for her including her birthday, her medical history and some personality traits. All I could do is stare at her picture. I have seen so many referral pictures online that my brain simply could not understand that THIS picture was our baby. All ours. I am still in a slight state of shock over it. I cannot believe we have a
little girl. And she is perfect.

On the way home, I was quiet. Rob asked what I was thinking. I wasn't thinking at all. The only thing I could do is repeat her name over and over in my head trying to convince myself that this was all real. Our agency says we will be traveling in 7-10 weeks. That seems like a long time, but we have her picture to stare at until then,
We rushed home so we could email pictures to everyone, including the boys who were at Grandma's for spring break. They were dying to see the new Mei Mei (little sister).

Rob and I went out to dinner in Platteville. We were both starving, but we couldn't eat. Our tummies were still on a roller coaster. We were so overcome with emotions that we couldn't do anything but stare at her picture (which was sitting on the table....our first dinner with our
daughter).
Now we get to wait again. But this wait is different. We have something real now. We know who she is and where she is. We will wait as long as we need to. She is ours forever.

March 2005

We learned this week that on Monday the 14th, referrals were mailed from Beijing headed for our agency. This was it. This was what we have been waiting for. It usually takes two or three days for the package to arrive, so this SHOULD be the week we get our "call".

On Wednesday, the package arrived at CCAI and they began the chore of translating all 126 referrals that came in. Ours was in that batch! Rob and I felt like we were holding our breath for the entire time. Our yahoo groups lit up with chatter. Everyone was wondering when on Thursday they would start calling the families. We tried not to think about it too much that evening, but it was hard not to. We finally gave in and got online about 8 pm. I had 156 emails! CCAI had announced our travel group numbers. We all had numbers, but didn't know where we were going. Needless to say, neither Rob nor I slept that night. Not a wink.
It felt like the night before Christmas, only Santa was bringing us our little girl.

February 16, 2005

I want this wait to be over. This is much harder than I thought it would be. I have this ache in my tummy that won't go away. I can't sleep, because I am up all night thinking about my little girl. I feel like crying all the time. I weep like a baby when I watch those adoption videos online, but I can't help myself. I am an addict. I can't get enough. I suppose it is very similar to how I would feel being eight and a half months pregnant. Thats pretty much were we would be at had we done this the "traditional" way. It still doesn't feel good. For a short month, February is DRAGGING on so long. I know we are next. Its our turn. But we just can't get there. I swear that there has been a few extra hours added to each day. I am just positive of it. We are so close, this is just not fair.

Maybe I am spending too much time thinking about the adoption. I can't concentrate at work because I am constantly wondering if I have emails. Not that I am really expecting to get the call yet. I don't know what I am expecting. I'll tell you this, I don't know how anyone does this more than once! Not the money necessarily (don't get me wrong, the money is a BIG part), but its so hard to hold on to a dream for so long and keep believing it with all the passion in your heart.

The official whistle has blown. We are next! The groups of referrals have been coming in and it has come up to our group. The next batch will include the picture of OUR little girl. Its hard to really explain the feelings that I am having. Excitement does not even come close. I'm nervous. The dreaded "What ifs" are haunting me lately. The other evening, it hit me. I had a complete meltdown. I was standing in the nursery looking at the porcelain dolls. One of the dolls played music, so I wound it up and listened. All of the sudden the tears started falling and I could not stop them. What if my little girl doesn't like dolls? What if she didn't like me? I could not help feeling utterly overwhelmed with questions. How can this little girl so many thousand miles away be eating at my heart so much. A little girl I had never met, but knew so well from my dreams. I cried myself to sleep that night.Now it is panic mode. Realizing that we are so close to our referral, I realized we are no where near ready to go to China. My packing lists were not even done until a few days ago. Now we need to try and buy or prepare everything to put IN those suitcases! All of those "things" that we have been saying we need to get....WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!!!

So many things to do and so little time to get it done. Guess I better get off my bottom and get moving. We have not even bought the Diaper Genie yet! How can we have a baby in the house without the diaper genie?? Sigh. Such are the things keeping me awake at night. Perhaps I am just practicing for being up at night. Perhaps its just my body saying "Get use to not sleeping...there's going to be a baby in the next room soon!"

Hopefully the next entry I make in this journal will have the words "We have a daughter". Oh my. The "rumor" is that the next batch of referrals is due in the end of February or beginning of March. That seems like only a breath away!

February 6, 2005

We are starting to wonder if our dreams will ever come true. Even as close as we are, it still seems so distant. The way its looking, we are going to be in China over Mother's Day. That is so far away. Maybe having her picture in my hand will make the time pass easier. Maybe I need to lay off the Yahoo groups for a while. Not that I don't love those folks to death, but I'm turning into a freak! I'm hanging on to every rumor that someone hears "through the grapevine". I know most of those rumors are not accurate, but I just can't stop!

I have been trying lately to keep busy. My boys are not liking that!! The house is spotless. Everything is organized in my house. We do the traditional "black bag cleanings" almost daily instead of monthly. The nursery is done. The baby book is as done as it can be at this point. I have made and amended (several times I might add) our travel packing list and pre-travel to-do lists. I have taken inventory of everything we already have for China (multiple times on that as well). I am studying up on how to use the camcorder. The camera equipment is ready to go. I am running out of things to do and have WAY too much time to OBSESS! Sigh.

If anyone upstairs is listening...I want my baby. Please.

January 2005

The new year begins with more waiting. We really should be getting use to this wait, but we're not. I have been trying to stay away from all the rumors on the Yahoo group, but it's like holding a carrot over starving horse's head. It's just not fair. There is officially only ONE group ahead of us to be matched. Just one. That means we are about SIX WEEKS away from our referral. (Rob reminded me of that the other night!) Six weeks until we have a picture of our little girl. Six weeks away from knowing where she is and where we will be going in China. I must admit that I am getting nervous. The butterflies in my stomach have officially moved in (for the next few months anyway). I can't believe I'm nervous. I have done the baby thing before...

But this is different than any pregnancy that I have been through. With a pregnancy, you at least have some idea WHEN it will happen. You know roughly WHAT she will look like based on what the mom and dad look like. You know when she arrives; she will be
newborn and will know approximately how BIG she will be. Not with adoption. We don't
know where she is. We don't know how old she is. We don't know how healthy she is.
We don't know exactly when she will be here. All we have is a picture in our minds when we close our eyes. The only reminder we have is the aching in our hearts, which I suppose, can be compared with a baby's kick during pregnancy. We honestly "feel" her.

With this new reminder of how close we are really getting to this, a sense of paranoia has set in. We are NOT ready to go to China yet!! I have this incredible packing list that I devised from many, many sample lists that I found online, and we have barely touched the surface of it. We have the luggage and backpacks to put the stuff in (thanks mom and dad for the great Christmas presents), but hardly anything to go into them! Eek. Can we say SHOPPING!?!?!?!?!?! Every week we are going to add a couple more things to the suitcases. Yes, they are already laid out ready to be packed. I have heard that's what you are supposed to do so we are not THAT weird. Are we? The cat is certainly making sure that we have enough CAT HAIR to go to China with. She makes it a point to sit on the suitcases at least once a day. (If they were open, she'd be in them!!!) It's as if SHE is waiting too. :-)

So here we are, waiting some more, but at least there is some activity in our not-so-distant future. If we get a referral in six weeks, we most likely won't travel until May (boooo hoooooo), but its still only about 120 days from when our daughter will be in our arms! Did you get that...120 days. If you look at it in days its seems so close. China here we come. (Still not ready for that 14 hour flight!!!)

I have heard different stories about match day (the day we get the call saying we have our referral). They will probably call me at work, because that is where they have called every time there has been a question. That means it may be up to me to keep my cool and ask all the important questions. I will tell everyone right now...I WILL BE CRYING when the call comes in. Regardless, I have made sure Rob has a copy of the list of questions (one at work and two at home). Just in case. Every time I think about getting "The Call", I get teary eyes. I know that's sappy and silly, but I can't help it. My dream is about to come true. I can hardly believe it. Pretty soon, I will be able to take her to the zoo, and rock her to sleep, and go camping with her AND PLAY BARBIE WITH HER!

Come on Father Time, have mercy on our impatient hearts. Bring us our baby, please.

December 2004

The holidays are coming. I have heard that I should not think about this, but my mind cannot help but fill with wonder and my heart full of sadness. As I have come to the realization that my daughter exists somewhere now on the other side
of this world, I understand this. This will be my baby's first Christmas. The circumstances of which she will spend what should be a joyous occasion are what haunt me in the middle of the night. My baby girl will spend her first Christmas
without celebration. Without acknowledgment of any kind. She will wake up her first Christmas morn not opening presents, but to wait her turn to be given the same old bottle by the same kind woman (her nanny) who only wishes her a better life. She will not be dressed in her best holiday dress, awaiting the camera flash full of smiles and laughter.

Instead she will lie in her crib, bundled so tight to keep the cold air from the orphanage from chilling her, staring blankly into the room. Wanting to be held, but knowing her cries will go unanswered until it is her "turn" with the caregiver. She
will spend her day without the company of loving family members and new toys, but with long sighs of desire and dreams for someone to be there with her.
Thinking about this can only make a waiting mom sad and wishing that by some miracle, her thoughts and prayers reach her little girl so very far away. It's so hard not to know where she is right now. To not be able to wrap my arms around
her and give her butterfly kisses on her warm, sweet cheeks.

This is the hard part about this wait. We are officially half way through this wait, but it seems so much longer than three months. All we can think about is that our baby girl is on the other side of this earth and we cannot be there with her. I
know the coming months will go fast. Actually, its hard to believe that it has been so many months since we decided to do this, but hearing about all the referrals that have come in, especially just before Christmas makes it even more difficult.
For the holidays, Rob and I decided that we were going to give each other baby stuff instead of our traditional present exchange. I have to admit this is so much fun. Its like buying the cute baby things that you wanted anyway, wrapping
them, then watching each other open them with delight and jubilation. It's so great. We received something this week that was absolutely fabulous! We got the stroller that we wanted. It was on our wish list and now it is in the nursery. It's
so wonderful. When I brought it in the door, the boys immediately wanted to put it together (it wasn't wrapped so its not like we didn't know what it was). I have not seen them so excited over something for the baby...especially Adam. HE
wanted to put it together and "No" was not an option. It made me smile, from the inside, watching him put the thing together (without reading the instructions no less) with such joy that could not be explained with words.

We placed a small ornament on the tree this year. A special one with a whole lot of sentiment for us. It is a small baby/ladybug. The head, arms and legs are a porcelain baby and the body is a jeweled ladybug. It represents our baby girl
out there. It is a reminder for us that our invisible red thread exists and that we are in some way connected to the precious angel half a world away.

All we ask for this Christmas is for Father Time to make this wait go quickly and to bring us together with our China Angel and for Santa Clause to bring us our baby for Christmas.

November 2004

Well, we are two months into our wait, approximately one third of the way! Thetas amazing that it has gone by so quickly. Now we have the holidays coming up and that ALWAYS proves to pass the time fast. The nursery is all but done. I catch Rob many times standing over the crib, closing his eyes...imagining his baby girl there. It's rather cute actually.

I am continuing to learn conversational Mandarin Chinese and have been practicing speaking it to the dog, who is becoming quite fluent as well. I have learn the three most important phrases that I can think I would need while in China. "Where is the hotel?" "Where is the Starbucks?" & "I would like to drink some beer!" What other phrases could I possibly need????

I have to admit that this wait is hard. Much harder than it was when I was pregnant with any of the boys. I have this empty pain inside, yearning for my baby. Every time I see referrals announced on my email group, I cry. I want it to be my turn. I want my little girl. (sigh)

October 2004

No news to report, nothing much has really changed in our waiting game. I've been sitting here thinking about how much my life is going to change once Rob and I receive that phone call saying we have a daughter. In many ways things will not change much. Sure, there is going to be more of those silly outlet covers and other baby proofing items throughout the house, but I at least have done the baby thing before. It won't be much different than it was with any of the boys. It will be different for me having my little girl. I cannot express in words how much this means. I thought this was a dead dream for me. I really didn't think I would ever get this dream answered.

For Rob, it is going to be another realm. The look on his face anytime we visit the baby store is something I have never seen before. He is excited, don't get me wrong, but I think he too is going through the same soul searching that I am, but on a very different level. This may be the only child he can actually call his own. Sure, the boys call him Dad, but I guarantee it's not the same. Not to him. I can see that in his face. He is terrified and anxious as well as excited out of his mind. I can't wait to see how he is when we get that referral or when our baby is placed in our arms. Here I really thought I knew everything there was to know about this man...but this is uncharted territory.

My Mom asked me the other day if the waiting was hard. Not really. I knew it was coming and I knew there was precious little I could do about it. It's like any pregnancy would have been without the morning sickness and the strange cravings. It's been over a month since our paperwork was logged into the Chinese government in Beijing, so we are into our wait enough for it to really start hitting home, but its okay. We have busied ourselves with setting up the nursery...let me tell you it looks fabulous! Not a day goes by that I don't think of something else to do. We completed our parenting workbook and have started some classes at our agency. The classes are a little bit cheesy, by we got to see referral pictures of other
parents that recently were matched and that is worth the house and a half drive in itself. It was so neat seeing what the infamous "referrals" look like. We also had the opportunity to talk to parents that are getting ready to leave for China and to parents who just returned home with their angels. It gives me goose bumps to think that will be us. It makes it feel real just seeing the sheer joy and elation on those parents faces. They are on such a natural high because of their new daughters. You can't help by smile too. It's amazing the power that they give off. You can almost soak it up. That will be us...soon. I think I understand now why the process is so long in the planning and the waiting. It's so the parents really truly appreciate the journey itself.

My oldest boy evoked some thought the other day. Amongst an argument (of course...he IS a teenager), he questioned why we were doing this "adoption thing". I had to think about it for a second. Why ARE we doing this? What is the root reason? I searched my heart and the answer was very clear. I told him this is something that I wanted. Something that I needed. This is something that I have dreamed about for as long as I can remember. There are so many people out there in the world that dream, with no hopes of them ever coming true. Not me. For me this is a missing puzzle piece that will help make me whole as a person and as a parent. I started to almost debate this topic in my head. Why shouldn't I have this? Other people get to do this...why not me" In a way, I am glad the wait is long and the journey is hard, because with each day that passes, I want this more and more with my entire heart and soul. I can close my eyes now and picture my little girl. I can see every
detail of her. I can even smell her, if that makes any sense. Every single day that goes by, that picture becomes clearer and closer. Pretty soon, I will able to enjoy my dream when I am awake. And I will be able to share that dream with everyone without having to describe it in such detail. I will get to live one of my dreams. How thankful I am for that. I hope that this teaches my boys how to make things happen for themselves. I hope it teaches them to appreciate all that they are and all they are capable of. I know this adoption so far has taught me more than I ever would have imagined. It has taught me to accept people for who they are and where they come from. It has taught me to appreciate other cultures and has opened my eyes to the world. It has taught me patience and definitely stress management! I think I am a better person and I am not done learning yet.

So here I sit, counting the days and daydreaming...waiting for my baby.

September 2004

Well so many things have happened in the past few weeks. Our agency has been plugging away at our dossier looking for any potential mistakes. We don't want the Chinese government spitting this out for some stupid clerical error. That I don't think I could handle. We received a call from Andrea at CCAI on Thursday September 2nd saying our dossier looked "perfect" and that she would be turning it over to the translations department. She said it could take up to a week for the translation department to complete the translated summary and that we would receive and email when it leaves for China. Oh goody! No problem.

We left to go camping for the weekend on the 3rd. It turned out to be the weekend from Hades because of all the rain and snow, so we packed up and came home a day early. (I was tired of being a human popsicle!) I logged on to the internet on Sunday night and scanned down the 104 emails that were in my inbox. One caught my eye. It said "Congratulations" and it was from CCAI. My heart skipped a beat and I help my breath as I opened it. Our dossier was sent to China on FRIDAY!! Holy cow. What happened to a WEEK! (Not that I am complaining...but wow!) Rob was in the shower at the time. I barged in to the bathroom screaming "We're DTC! We're DTC!" Rob stared at me like I was completely nuts. He shrieked "What??????" Neither one of us could believe it. We printed out the email as proof. We are still in shock.

Now our clock starts. We start counting down to our baby. This is such a bizarre feeling. We are excited, nervous and anxious all at once. The part that has me worried the most is that awful 14-hour flight. I hate to fly. This is not going to be the height of our journey. Oh well, I have about six months to make myself crazy worrying about it. Plenty of time for therapy or a support group or something.
Now I get to focus on our travel lists. Yes, I have already started them. I even have them on an Excel spreadsheet all color-coded and everything. Anyone that knows me would expect no less...I am sure.

Here's to hopes and dreams that do actually come true! What an awesome feeling that is!

August 22, 2004

When starting this adoption process, we were told it would be a plethora of emotions. We have definitely sampled so much from the desert tray of mood swings. These past two weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions. After saying goodbye to our paperwork as it left to be authenticated, we were nail biting and nervous. We received back the envelope from the Houston Consulate first as we thought we would. My email group predicted their good service. Then a day after that, we received back the envelope from the Embassy in Washington DC. What great service. A few days later, on a whim, we decided to check the tracking number on the third and final envelope just in case it left. Oh boy! It did! But then it was taken back to the consulate in Chicago the same day. Start the panic mode. This would have been last Monday. Then on Tuesday we received a call from the consulate. Adam took the message at home. "Some Chinese dude called. You have to send four something for more postage." That was it. That was the message. So here we had to call the consulate, ask for "Some Chinese dude" and tell him we had to send "four something" for postage. That was a difficult phone call to make. Well, turns out the man at the consulate was really nice. His name was Zhou (pronounced "Joe") and he instructed me what to do. We overnighted the extra postage.

So we expected to see the envelope on Thursday. No problem. Oh wait...problem. Thursday came and NO ENVELOPE. Tracking information said it was still at the consulate. Kick in overdrive panic mode. After some crying, an email to our agency and a "Calm down" call from our contact in the dossier team, we were assured someone would call the consulate to find out where our envelope was. On Friday, we received the $#!@*&^ envelope! Call off the dogs and cancel the panic mode. Rob picked up the envelope from the post office, brought it to my office, and we made a thousand copies (or so it seemed). Then he drove it down to our adoption agency and placed it in our case workers hands. SIGH! Stress went away.

Now our dossier will be reviewed and translated and CHINA BOUND! So much work, so
many papercuts and now we are done. We can "relax" and wait for the call that says we have a daughter in China.

August 11, 2004

Last week (on Thursday), we did the hardest thing so far this adoption. We watched as Big Brown (AKA the UPS guy) too three envelopes away containing upwards of a thousand dollars and three months (and a lot of stress). Their destination? The Chinese consulates/embassy. There they will be authenticated and sent back to us in overnight envelopes. We were told they could take three to four weeks. Owie. Thats okay. Last Thursday night we came to a realization, sitting there stressing over "I hope it doesn't get lost" and "I hope it doesn't take too long". We decided there was really no point in stressing over it from here on out. Everything from now until the time that baby is placed in our arms is completely beyond our control. It was actually a good feeling. A release.

Today, the 11th, we got a wonderful gift in our post office box. We got a slip from the postmaster saying that our envelope from the Houston Consulate is there! COOOOOOOLLLL! We knew it would be the first one back, but that is excellent service! Those folks deserve a raise! We had heard through the adoption grapevine that the Houston Consulate was really moving things through but that surpassed our expectations. Its always nice when that happens. This had made Rob a little anxious. He said "if we get the other ones back by Friday then we could...". There is no point expecting it, because then Murphey's Law says it's NOT going to happen. It would be nice, but we WON'T be expecting it. Next week would be nice too. Heck, the only thing the consulate needs to really do with the paperwork is give it a once-over, make sure all the "i"s are dotted and the "t"s are crossed, staple a nice cover page on it with their seal and VOILA! Done, just like that. Well, I am sure there is probably a little more to it than that, but my way sounds much FASTER. The way fate is laying out the cards, we will be a September DTC group. Thats okay too. August would have been better, but again...we can't expect it. (But then again, you never do know do you.........)

August 4, 2004

Well, we finally received our I171H from the US Department of Immigration, which is the biggest sigh of relief ever. Our agency told us that it "could" take up to eight weeks. I almost cried when they told us that. I heard from several people on my email group that the Denver Immigration Office (called the BCIS office) was processing the first half of the alphabet really fast. Good news for us! We are the sixth letter in the alphabet! Woo hoo! After ten business days I was starting to freak. I was thinking "just watch, they are going to take the maximum eight weeks to process". I cried several times thinking about it. I didn't think I could wait that
long for a stupid piece of paper.

Well, it arrived on Monday August 2nd. I went from begging our post office box, to cursing it, to tears of joy. I am convinced our postmaster, who I am SURE was behind the wall listening, thinks I am a complete wacko! I am. I am crazy about the idea that in the first few months of 2005, I will have the daughter I have dreamed about since I was a child. This journey for me has been longer than a few months so far. This is a life dream that I (and my dear hubby of course) am making come true. That feeling of euphoria is something that cannot be easily explained.

Rob is taking the Colorado paperwork we have down to the Secretary of State tomorrow and we are sending off our (tons) of paperwork to the Chinese consulates in the US on Friday. After that, we are DTC (Documents to China). This is the biggie! Then our timer starts. The sands of fate begin to fall through the hourglass and we wait for that ever-so-important call that we have a daughter. Its looking like a five to six month wait for our angel. No problem. I can take up that time fixing up the nursery.
Speaking of nursery, I can honestly say that we have a NURSERY now. I moved all the office stuff out of the den and it is (slowly) being transformed into a magical place that, this time next year, our beautiful baby girl will be sleeping. Oh my. That is such a wonderful thought. I can hardly wait!!!

The Fortune Cookie

For those of you who believe in the mysterious, I thought I should share this with you. We have been so worried thinking that we weren't going to get our paperwork done in time for an August send off to China. Last week I got a fortune cookie that said "Every truly great accomplishment is at first impossible". Then on the back it has those silly Learn Chinese words. The word was AUGUST. Perhaps it is still possible.

July 24, 2004

I had to put in a separate entry for today. In my opinion, this has been a monumental day. No, we didn't receive any long awaited document nor have we been approved for anything or made any travel plans. I was feeling a little blue, needing something to remind me that this long hard wait is for something so precious. I made Rob take me baby shopping. I have to tell you I feel SO much better now. I can't explain the feeling of utter elation. Things feel more concrete and real.

First we started out by going to a near new shop in Fort Collins. I love these little shops. I'll have to remember to go WITHOUT Rob next time so I can shop longer. This place has beautiful clothing and accessories (couple cribs and strollers too). We found an outfit that could not be passed up. Its a "Spa Set" that still has the tag on it and it was only six bucks. It consists of a pink fluffy robe and matching slippers. Its Mary's hot tub outfit and its perfect. Rob found a stuffed fire truck that will be good to take with us to China (light weight) and I found a Raggedy Andy doll (a good one with the embroidered face). Could not pass that up!

From there we went to Big Lots (a discount store in Fort Collins). BOY WAS THAT FUN! I love those places! We found all kinds of things for the nursery and for the baby. We found a table and chair set (the legs look like pencils), a matching set of stacking block shelves and a WHOLE BUNCH of little stuff. Rob had never been in a store like this. I think he enjoyed the experience too (except for the paying part). Then we headed over to Toys R' Us. We had heard they had cribs and strollers and stuff and wanted to see what they had to offer (just window shop a bit). Trust me, we could have blown a couple hours in that place. You know that old commercial about never growing up and always being a Toys R' Us kid? Its still holds true. We were perusing the cribs. They did not have much of a selection, but their prices were real good. Then a sales clerk (who had been following us around for ten minutes) handed us a flyer with a bunch of coupons. They had a great deal that if you bought a crib and a mattress, you saved $25. Well the mattress was only $29, so that was
quite a deal. I didn't even sit there and try to convince Rob we needed to buy a crib! Before I knew it Rob snagged a mattress and a ticket for not just a crib, but for the matching changing table too. I was not one that was about to argue with a man so determined (who also had the checkbook)!!! We are now the proud owners of a Jenny Lind crib and matching changing table.

When we got home, we played musical furniture (making room in the soon to be nursery) and assembled the crib. For something that was "easy to assemble" and required no tools, it still took three of us to figure it out. Oops. I guess we are a little out of practice! Once the crib was put together (and the cat climbed in), I could not help but feel a sense of "Oh my god". We have a crib. A crib for our baby girl. I have to admit, I got a little choked up. This is really happening. Our dream is coming true. How many people in this world get that? Probably not enough.
So now we have a daily reminder that our daughter will be waiting half a world away for us to come and bring her home. I have the feeling she will be born next month. A summer baby. I hope some how our thoughts make it to her so she knows. We are coming for you, my angel.
Just wait and see.....

July 2004 - Entry 3

We received confirmation from our adoption agency that our paperwork has been sent off to immigration. Woo hoo. The depressing thing is that she said it could take up to eight weeks, which would put us mid September before we can even begin the authentication process. That stings. I am hopeful it doesn't take that long. I know it won't take that long, but even if it is possible, I think I will explode! I just want our paperwork to be in the hands of the Chinese government's capable hands. I am confident they are going to chose a perfect little girl for us. I know timing is everything and that if our paperwork goes through any earlier, than we would not end up with the baby girl that is specifically meant for us. This waiting hurts. We are sooooo upset that our home study was delayed by three weeks. Does this mean something? Was it delayed for divine reasons?? I know I don't think about nor talk
about God very much, but maybe he is trying to tell us something. I will try to be patient.

We have started the nursery. My old home office is going bye-bye and there are signs of pink showing up. Emily (my niece) and I painted pink butterflies and pink bows on the top of the wall in lieu of a wallpaper border. Then we tacked (fake) ivy along the top. It looks very "Mid-Summer's Eve-ish" (if there is such a phrase). We (I say "we" I mean "I" because Rob really has no idea what I am doing) were going to do ballerina motif, but I am really liking the butterflies and ivy. I think we are going to keep running with that. We are going to tack fluffy clouds on the ceiling and hang some butterflies and dragonflies. I repainted the black shelves on the walls to a nice subtle white and put them back on the walls with the dolls. I think we need more dolls on the walls. It TOTALLY screams Little Girl!! No...I am NOT
getting carried away. Am I? I want this whole little girl thing so bad I can taste it. I am not sure that Rob fully understands this need I have. Don't get me wrong, I love my boys to death, but I want a girl. I almost need her to complete me. I know, I'm nuts. You can say that. I am past the denial.
I have been reading a lot of adoption stories on the internet. I especially love the ones with the pictures. I love reading other experiences and I take notes learning from those who have gone before us. I do however find myself tearing up at them. I hope thats normal. I can picture myself in that situation. That will be Rob and I. It becomes more real every hurdle we overcome. I just wish time was our friend and things would process more rapidly. I can hardly wait. I can almost feel her in my arms. I can close my eyes and see her. I feel I already know her yet we have not met, and she probably isn't even born yet. That makes me smile. I am coming for you, my daughter. Be patient.

July 2004 - Entry 2

Well the fingerprinting is done. Actually it was almost fun. We had heard evil stories about the INS office in Denver and were fully prepared to sit there for several hours. We arrived about 9:00 am (they actually opened at 8am but we were running a tad late). There was a line out the door. We gasped of course and got inline. Luckily, the line was just for checking in and most of the people ahead of us were not there to be fingerprinted. Once checked in, we only had to wait about ten minutes before they called our numbers. This INS office utilizes the fancy digital scanning which requires no ink. They squirt a bunch of lotion onto your palms (actually it was plain Cornhuskers lotion) and have you rub it in really well. They start pressing your fingers onto a glass scanner. It really was almost fun! It was neat watching the computer scan the fingerprints and then tell you if its acceptable or if it has to be rescanned. Modern technology is great. All in all, we were in the INS office for about a half an hour. The technician that did my fingerprinting handed me a survey card that I was most eager to fill out. They received an excellent review. Their people were friendly and efficient and there was not a long wait. We did hear that Saturdays at the INS office is a total nightmare. I'm glad we planned ahead.

From here we are waiting on our I171H from immigration. I know it can take one to six weeks to get his, but I am HOPEFUL from the rumors I have been hearing online. One couple received their I171H in two and a half weeks (from the Denver office no less.) Come on immigration. Our baby is waiting. I want our paperwork sent off to China by the end of August. Its a realistic goal I think. Everyone pray!!!

July 2004 - Entry 1

Well, the home study is finally complete. We have suffered terrible frustration just to get this silly document completed. I am sorry to say that much of the grief through this home study was due to the social worker. She was not the most organized of all people. Not very punctual either (was late to every meeting we had). But alas, it is complete. The report was turned into our agency on the 8th. From here its forwarded to a company called Adoption Alliance. This is a state department that looks over the home study and makes sure it covers all the state requirements for an adoption. Yes, everyone has a hand in this and EVERYONE knows our personal business. We were a little afraid of this at first, airing our "dirty laundry" to the general public, but now the only thing we can focus on is getting our little girl. With
each process we complete (each checkmark on the TO DO list), this becomes more real.
Now we are starting to be able to picture us in China. We can close our eyes and see a faint shadow of our baby girl. This has never felt more right for both of us.
I (Heather) have been filling my time reading adoption stories online. I must admit I am THOROUGHLY addicted to them. I especially like the ones with pictures. I have even caught Rob reading them, with a tear in his eye I might add. Its hard not to.

This will be us. This is us. We share the same destiny.
We watched a National Geographic special on TV that was called China's Lost Girls. This too gave us chills. These crazy American Parents traveling to China to pick up their daughters....this will be us! I (Heather) have joined an email group of hundreds of other parents waiting to get their Chinese daughters. This program on tv was the talk of the email town. Everyone wanted to see it. We are glad we had the chance to watch it.

We have been reading and hearing about so many topics lately surrounding adoption
including what formula (American) is closest to Chinese formula (Yes there is a BIG
difference), retaining at least part of the baby's Chinese name as her legal "American" name and the big issue of how much about her heritage we should teach her. The heritage topic is one that has us the most confused. There are so many opinions that we are not sure what to think or believe. I think we are going to have to do some more research on that.

Part of our preparations for this adoption include classes we are required to take. We have to have twelve hours of "training" prior to leaving for China and twelve hours within a year after we return. This training includes such topics as attachment and bonding issues, behavior issues and general infant & toddler knowledge. The infant and toddler knowledge is what cracks me up. We have three children. Obviously we knew a little something about infants and toddlers because I am proud to admit ALL OUR CHILDREN ARE STILL LIVING (though we question that daily with our demonic fourteen-year-old). Since we live so far away from our agency, we were allowed to do some of the training via a workbook. Let me tell you some of the stuff in there is LUDICROUS!!! On the very first page, the exercise has us drawing a picture of what we think our adopted daughter will look like, I am afraid to tell everyone that the drawing that I made has a fatal disease and will not survive (it
mostly resembles a stick figure). Eek. We feel like we are in first grade again....whipping out the crayons!!! Its rather comical actually.

June 2004

We have met with our social worker several times now. (A couple meetings at Starbucks!!! Works for me!!!) She told us she just about had all the information she needed to complete the home study. I think she completely filled up an entire legal pad with information about us.

Was this good? Was it normal? Did this mean we were freaks?? So many questions went
through our minds.At our last meeting, she told us she was a little worried about the transition with the adoption and Adam. Adam??? Why would she be worried about him?? She thought he would slip out of the picture once the baby got here. Rob and I reminded her that he was VERY fourteen and right now he wanted NOTHING to do with his "uncool" family. She understood. She said she would try to have the home study done by the end of the following week. The end of that week came and no home study. We finally broke down and called her.

#1 bump in the road to adoption!! Apparently her computer had developed a terrible case of the ick and ATE out home study. She would have to start all over. I cried. This was not fair. We felt like this adoption was going no where. And we were powerless. We started to think it was never going to happen. I cried some more. I know many other couples have gone through this and I know we will get there eventually, but I could not help but sob like a baby. I would read the stories online and bawl my eyes out. Rob had no idea what to do. He tried. He brought me home flowers and chocolates and a toy for the baby. Mom saw I was upset and ordered something off my baby wishlist. I appreciate the efforts, but the only thing that
will make me feel better at this point is THE DANG HOME STUDY!!!

May 2004 - Entry 2

"Paperchasing" is what this is called. How little did we know how appropriate that word was. As redundant as any other government paperwork is (taxes, etc.), this is far worse. We must have read over the list of paperwork we needed to gather a dozen times, each time scratching our heads further. Huh???? We needed to gather two sets of paperwork. One for immigration, proving to our government that we were good people and not criminals. One for the Chinese government...this one is called our "Dossier" and will introduce us to the Peoples Republic of China and prove to them that we "deserve" one of their orphans. I am sure that is not the politically correct way to describe it, but that sure is how it feels. This paperwork for China
must have all "official" copies, documented by a notary, certified by the secretary of state that the notary is genuine and "authenticated" by the Chinese Embassy or Consulate in the US. In other words, we need a notary to put their John Hancock on the paperwork saying "Yup...this is their paperwork". Then the sec. of state has to put their seal on it and say "Yup, that's the notary's seal". Then the Chinese Embassy (or consulate...depending on where it is) has to look over everything, put their seal on it and say "Yup, thats the notary's seal and the sec. of state's
seal". I'll tell you something, this is by far the DUMBEST system I have ever seen. Sorry. Just had to get that one out.By the end of May, we had gathered everything we needed except for my birth certificate. I was born in a DC State (surrounding Washington DC) so I had to go through a separate step.

After I received my birth certificate (henceforth referred to as BC) from Vital Statistics in Maryland, I had to send it back our to Maryland to have the sec. of state certify it. Then it had to be sent BACK east to Washington DC to the US Dept of State Authentication Office. Holy cow. You would think in this age of technology SOMEONE would have figured out a better way to this system. (Sigh) Once everything is gathered, we have to wait to have them authenticated (because authentication has expiration dates).

The HOME STUDY comes next. We met with our social worker, Myra. She is sweet. She
asked a whole lot of questions. It was very intimidating. We were paranoid, of course and the house was SPOTLESS! She talked to the children, asked them what they liked and what they thought of the adoption. Jake and Canaan responded with acceptable answers (in our books). Adam of course decided to put on the fourteen-year-old hat and say something stupid. Myra asked Adam if he liked school, he said yes. She asked him what he liked best about school and Adam opened his mouth and put his foot in. He said "It gets me out of the house and away from the family". We were MORTIFIED. My heart sunk to the pit of my stomach. This social worker was going to think we were horrible parents because our oldest son hates to be home!!!!!! Oh my god. I couldn't breathe. Rob lost all expression on his face. After Adam left the room, Myra informed us that she too had a fourteen-year-old and she understood.
WHEW!!!!!!

Oh, one other thing we got this month...we received our "invitation to be fingerprinted" from immigration. I pulled it out of the mail the night Adam had his graduation from middle school. I showed everyone at the graduation!!!! They thought I was psycho. Probably still do.