July 2004 - Entry 1

Well, the home study is finally complete. We have suffered terrible frustration just to get this silly document completed. I am sorry to say that much of the grief through this home study was due to the social worker. She was not the most organized of all people. Not very punctual either (was late to every meeting we had). But alas, it is complete. The report was turned into our agency on the 8th. From here its forwarded to a company called Adoption Alliance. This is a state department that looks over the home study and makes sure it covers all the state requirements for an adoption. Yes, everyone has a hand in this and EVERYONE knows our personal business. We were a little afraid of this at first, airing our "dirty laundry" to the general public, but now the only thing we can focus on is getting our little girl. With
each process we complete (each checkmark on the TO DO list), this becomes more real.
Now we are starting to be able to picture us in China. We can close our eyes and see a faint shadow of our baby girl. This has never felt more right for both of us.
I (Heather) have been filling my time reading adoption stories online. I must admit I am THOROUGHLY addicted to them. I especially like the ones with pictures. I have even caught Rob reading them, with a tear in his eye I might add. Its hard not to.

This will be us. This is us. We share the same destiny.
We watched a National Geographic special on TV that was called China's Lost Girls. This too gave us chills. These crazy American Parents traveling to China to pick up their daughters....this will be us! I (Heather) have joined an email group of hundreds of other parents waiting to get their Chinese daughters. This program on tv was the talk of the email town. Everyone wanted to see it. We are glad we had the chance to watch it.

We have been reading and hearing about so many topics lately surrounding adoption
including what formula (American) is closest to Chinese formula (Yes there is a BIG
difference), retaining at least part of the baby's Chinese name as her legal "American" name and the big issue of how much about her heritage we should teach her. The heritage topic is one that has us the most confused. There are so many opinions that we are not sure what to think or believe. I think we are going to have to do some more research on that.

Part of our preparations for this adoption include classes we are required to take. We have to have twelve hours of "training" prior to leaving for China and twelve hours within a year after we return. This training includes such topics as attachment and bonding issues, behavior issues and general infant & toddler knowledge. The infant and toddler knowledge is what cracks me up. We have three children. Obviously we knew a little something about infants and toddlers because I am proud to admit ALL OUR CHILDREN ARE STILL LIVING (though we question that daily with our demonic fourteen-year-old). Since we live so far away from our agency, we were allowed to do some of the training via a workbook. Let me tell you some of the stuff in there is LUDICROUS!!! On the very first page, the exercise has us drawing a picture of what we think our adopted daughter will look like, I am afraid to tell everyone that the drawing that I made has a fatal disease and will not survive (it
mostly resembles a stick figure). Eek. We feel like we are in first grade again....whipping out the crayons!!! Its rather comical actually.